You get what you pray for

[dreamy]

This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing." "They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?'"

"That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship the Lord."

"Thank you!" the woman responded.

So the next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest's house. The priest's two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.

The lady puts her female parrots in with the male parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?"

One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and exclaims, "Put the beads away. Our prayers have been answered!"

[LLady]

#happy# #happy# #happy#

[krystal]

#happy# #happy# #happy#

[andi]

Not bad at all! #happy#

[smudger]

An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly
his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness Monster. In one easy
flip, the beast tossed him and his boat at least a hundred
feet into the air. It then opened it's mouth waiting below to
swallow them both.

As the man sailed head over heels and started to fall
towards the open jaws of the ferocious beast he cried out,
"Oh, my God! Help me!"

Suddenly, the scene froze in place and as the atheist hung
in midair a booming voice came out of the clouds and said, "I
thought you didn't believe in Me!"

"God, come on, give me a break!" the man pleaded, "Just
seconds ago I didn't believe in the Loch Ness Monster
either!"

"Well," said God, "now that you are a believer, you must
understand that I won't work miracles to snatch you from
certain death in the jaws of the monster, but I can change
hearts. What would you have me do?"

The atheist thinks for a minute then says, "God, please have
the Loch Ness Monster believe in You also.

"God replies, "So be it."

The scene starts in motion again with the atheist falling
towards the ravenous jaws of the monster. The Loch Ness
Monster folds his claws together and says, "Lord, bless this
food You have so graciously provided . . ."

[dreamy]

#happy# #happy# #happy#

[LLady]

smudger said:

An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly
his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness Monster. In one easy
flip, the beast tossed him and his boat at least a hundred
feet into the air. It then opened it's mouth waiting below to
swallow them both.

As the man sailed head over heels and started to fall
towards the open jaws of the ferocious beast he cried out,
"Oh, my God! Help me!"

Suddenly, the scene froze in place and as the atheist hung
in midair a booming voice came out of the clouds and said, "I
thought you didn't believe in Me!"

"God, come on, give me a break!" the man pleaded, "Just
seconds ago I didn't believe in the Loch Ness Monster
either!"

"Well," said God, "now that you are a believer, you must
understand that I won't work miracles to snatch you from
certain death in the jaws of the monster, but I can change
hearts. What would you have me do?"

The atheist thinks for a minute then says, "God, please have
the Loch Ness Monster believe in You also.

"God replies, "So be it."

The scene starts in motion again with the atheist falling
towards the ravenous jaws of the monster. The Loch Ness
Monster folds his claws together and says, "Lord, bless this
food You have so graciously provided . . ."