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Post by braveheart007 on Oct 18, 2005 22:48:34 GMT 10
The Evolution of Mom
Yes, parenthood changes everything. But parenthood also changes with each baby. Here, some of the ways having a second and third child differs from having your first:
Your Clothes - 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy. 2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes *are* your regular clothes.
The Baby's Name - 1st baby: You pore over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favorites. 2nd baby: Someone has to name their kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you. 3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger falls. Bimaldo? Perfect!
Preparing for the Birth - 1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously. 2nd baby: You don't bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing. 3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.
The Layette - 1st baby: You prewash your newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau. 2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains. 3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
Worries - 1st baby: At the first sign of distress - a whimper, a frown - you pick up the baby. 2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn. 3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.
Activities - 1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour. 2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics. 3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.
Going Out - 1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times. 2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached. 3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.
At Home - 1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby. 2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby. 3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
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Post by LLady on Oct 19, 2005 3:46:08 GMT 10
The "Make Do" Woman
When I was preparing to get married, I started getting all sorts of
Advice especially at bridal showers and things like that from family and friends
But one of the most interesting "lessons" came from a woman I met for the
first time, just a few weeks before the big day
She said, "Honey, whatever you do, don't ever let yourself become a
"make-do"woman" I had no idea what she meant, but, of course, she was
about to explain
She continued, "men" don't deny themselves anything. Whatever they want
To buy, they buy. Whatever they want to do, they do. Meanwhile, there is the
wife, making do with her hair not being done, her clothes from yesteryear,
her nails in need, never had a pedicure, scraping the bottom of her tube of
lipstick! Oh, I could go on and on with how "we" make do.
And why? Because the car needs fixing, this bill is behind, we have to
use our time to take care of this, or take care of that; we're saving for
this, working, cooking, cleaning, raising, etc." She warned me to never
become a make-do woman, because she says if you start, it is hard to stop
and one could easily find themselves making-do for the rest of their lives.
I vowed it would never happen to me. I didn't think much more of the
conversation until one day, I began to take notice, she was right. Men are
a lot better at being good to themselves. Some call it being selfish,
there has to be another word for it. Tell me if you know. Whatever you
call it. It does have it's place.
When they want to play ball, or golf, or fish, they go! When they want
To buy clothes, or equipment, or video games, or whatever their "thing" is,
they buy! Have you ever tried to stop one? Has anyone ever been able to
stop one? Let me know! When I look around, I see a whole heap of
make-do women, married or not, with or without children, they are all over the
place!
I have decided that I am going to make my best effort to become a
"make-time"woman! I will make the time to do what I need to do to be
good to myself, whether that's a trip to the salon, or the gym or the mall.
This time I'm gonna take a lesson from the guys!
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Post by smudger on Oct 19, 2005 5:06:52 GMT 10
I had a damm good laugh at all the posts here ;D are men and women so different ?
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Post by dreamy on Oct 19, 2005 5:20:46 GMT 10
I had a damm good laugh at all the posts here ;D are men and women so different ? Hey you're married! You should know the differences by now!
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Post by smudger on Oct 19, 2005 8:22:47 GMT 10
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Post by dreamy on Oct 19, 2005 8:29:58 GMT 10
You're welcome! #ssmile#
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Post by braveheart007 on Oct 19, 2005 11:43:21 GMT 10
Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Women 10. I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance") 9. There's a slight difference in our ages. (I don't want to do my dad) 8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. (You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes upon) 7. My life is too complicated right now. (I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other guys I'm seeing) 6. I've got a boyfriend. (I prefer my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's) 5. I don't date men where I work. (I wouldn't date you if you were in the same 'solar system', much less the same building) 4. It's not you, it's me. (It's you) 3. I'm concentrating on my career. (Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better than dating you) 2. I'm celibate. (I've sworn off only the men like you) 1. Let's be friends. (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with. It's that male perspective thing) Ian
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Post by braveheart007 on Oct 19, 2005 11:44:15 GMT 10
Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Men 10. I think of you as a sister. (You're ugly) 9. There's a slight difference in our ages. (You're ugly) 8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. (You're ugly) 7. My life is too complicated right now. (You're ugly) 6. I've got a girlfriend. (You're ugly) 5. I don't date women where I work. (You're ugly) 4. It's not you, it's me. (You're ugly) 3. I'm concentrating on my career. (You're ugly) 2. I'm celibate. (You're ugly) 1. Let's be friends. (You're sinfully ugly) Ian
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Post by dreamy on Oct 19, 2005 16:24:10 GMT 10
Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Men 10. I think of you as a sister. (You're ugly) 9. There's a slight difference in our ages. (You're ugly) 8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. (You're ugly) 7. My life is too complicated right now. (You're ugly) 6. I've got a girlfriend. (You're ugly) 5. I don't date women where I work. (You're ugly) 4. It's not you, it's me. (You're ugly) 3. I'm concentrating on my career. (You're ugly) 2. I'm celibate. (You're ugly) 1. Let's be friends. (You're sinfully ugly) Ian Oh, notice all the manyfold reasons men have for rejection... #ssmile# #happy# ...oh, I loved these ones!
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Elly
Administrator
Posts: 29,887
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Post by Elly on Oct 19, 2005 18:03:57 GMT 10
Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Women 10. I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance") 9. There's a slight difference in our ages. (I don't want to do my dad) 8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. (You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes upon) 7. My life is too complicated right now. (I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone calls from all the other guys I'm seeing) 6. I've got a boyfriend. (I prefer my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's) 5. I don't date men where I work. (I wouldn't date you if you were in the same 'solar system', much less the same building) 4. It's not you, it's me. (It's you) 3. I'm concentrating on my career. (Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better than dating you) 2. I'm celibate. (I've sworn off only the men like you) 1. Let's be friends. (I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with. It's that male perspective thing) Ian love the ladies responses
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Elly
Administrator
Posts: 29,887
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Post by Elly on Oct 19, 2005 18:32:40 GMT 10
Facts about men (according to women):
1. Why does a man have a clear conscience? Because it's never used.
2. Why are men so happy? Because ignorance is bliss.
3. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for a man then for a woman? Because when it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there.
4. If a man and a woman fell off a 10-story building at the same time, who would reach the ground first? The woman, the man would get lost.
5. How are men like commercials? You can't believe a word either one of them says and they both last about 60 seconds.
6. How do men exercise at the beach? By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a woman in a bikini.
7. What do you call a man with half a brain? Gifted.
8. What's the difference between government bonds and men? Bonds Mature.
9. What did God say after creating man? I can do better.
10. What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1. No mind. 2. No business.
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Post by dreamy on Oct 19, 2005 22:51:29 GMT 10
# 3, 7, 9 ...oh how so bad! #devil# #devil#
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